


A Weird Week

by wraithkid



Category: Naruto
Genre: No Plot/Plotless, No Ship, One Shot, Other, the only ship is friendship - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-20
Updated: 2017-12-20
Packaged: 2019-02-17 12:08:41
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,206
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13076568
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wraithkid/pseuds/wraithkid
Summary: listen i haven't written anything in like... 4 years at leastoneshot, not really canon following, literally this is like a filler episode because theres no real plotSai wonders what it means to be accepted, and boy he wishes Naruto would just stop shaking him all the time.





	A Weird Week

**Author's Note:**

> yo I'm sorry if u read this its a pointless drabble and not very cohesive but like, it was a good way for me to waste 3 hours so like have fun i guess whatever

“Sai, this really isn’t healthy.”

He blinked, smiling reassuringly back at her. Sakura always liked it when he smiled this way. It was a surefire way to get her to stop voicing her concerns. He knew he probably wasn’t the picture of health, but he was supposed to be bonding with people his age, so what was the issue? He wasn't even that hungover.

Sakura sighed, shaking her head in defeat. There was nothing she could really do when he was like this, and they both knew it. He was surprisingly stubborn, despite his consistent apathy. She helped him up off the floor and walked him over to the chair. “I don’t know how I got stuck babysitting a bunch of grown men, I mean really.”

“You don’t have to help me.”

The look on her face was either exasperation or gas. Sai was never great at telling which one it was with her. 

“If you’re here, then where is Naruto?”

“I’m not his keeper--- why don’t you ask him?” Sai said, pointing to where one stray arm stuck out from between Naruto’s bed and the wall. 

“Is that--- that idiot, he better be wearing clothes this time!”

***

He sighed. It was starting to get colder, he supposed. He didn’t pay much mind to the weather these days, but a slight crispness to the air had started to show the summer fading away. He supposed it didn’t really matter what temperature it was. He wore the same thing year round anyways.

Naruto threw his arm around Sai in a friendly gesture that Sai wasn’t really sure about. He had attempted to do the same thing to Naruto once, while sitting next to him, but Naruto had gotten really mad about it---- he still wasn’t sure what the issue was.  
“It looks like we’ll be working together again,” Naruto said, jostling Sai slightly.

Sai nodded, trying to figure out if this was some kind of new dance or if Naruto would ever stop shaking him. Was this… normal?

“The Land of Rice Paddies again, huh?” That was Kakashi, making his appearance in the tree again. Why did he always do that? Was Kakashi in some sort of never-ending The Floor Is Lava tournament with Guy?  
Sai didn’t know.  
“Hey, where’s Sakura?”

“She’s probably gathering supplies still--- she is kind of late though. This isn’t like her.” 

Sai wasn’t sure this was real. It was hard for him to tell sometimes. He didn’t really dream though, so he supposed it must have been real, right? Last time he had stabbed himself with a Kunai, thinking he was trapped in some form of genjutsu, he had ended up in the hospital for an unfortunate amount of time.

Apparently they were concerned about his mental state, not his leg. 

Sai felt the same as he always did. Which was to say, he didn’t feel at all.

“Do you think it’ll snow?” 

“Huh--- what? Sai it’s barely past summer! Of course it won’t.” 

Sai squinted at the sky. Was it really that early in the year? He could have sworn they were almost to winter by now.

“Oh! There’s Sakura!” Naruto perked up instantly--- Sai may have been oblivious but he wasn’t quite that oblivious. Everyone in the Leaf Village knew about Naruto’s life-long crush on Sakura. Sakura could care less.

“Sorry guys--- a team came back with some injuries and we’re low on Medical Ninja right now, so I had to fix them up really quick,” she said, adjusting her bags. “Are you guys all set then?”

“You bet--- I’ve been waiting all year for something like this!”

Where did Naruto find that kind of enthusiasm? Why was he waiting for this mission for so long? Sai was not so sure about Naruto’s health sometimes. 

“What is---- Naruto what is on your face?”

Naruto had, of course, fallen asleep first at Rock Lee’s birthday party. Sai, naturally, had taken some liberties. Naruto really needed a mustache and monocle to look more… distinguished. At least he didn’t draw any dicks this time. At least, not on his face.

Sai snorted a little--- not audibly, and nothing Naruto would notice. 

Kakashi, on the other hand…. Sai glanced briefly at him. If he had noticed, he wasn’t telling the other two. Not that it really mattered. He didn’t have to hide anything with them anyways. 

***  
“Sai, how could you?” Naruto was, apparently, devastated. 

“I was just trying to improve your face--- I didn’t have a very good canvas to work with though.”

“Wh---what are you trying to say, Sai?”

Sai smiled at him. “There’s not much I can do to improve a face like yours, Naruto.”

“I mean, it is a pretty good---hey why do I feel like that was an insult?”

Sai shrugged, smiling still as he leapt ahead. 

From a distance, he heard Naruto complaining to Sakura, who clearly had had enough of him already. 

“Well, maybe if you washed your face once in awhile, Naruto, you would have noticed before we left the village!” 

“But Sakuraaaa---“

Sai heard the telltale crashes of an irritated Sakura. He was glad he had taken the lead--- no doubt he would have also faced the repercussions that Naruto faced now.

***  
The mission itself was a fairly easy one—fetch the treasure, protect it, deliver it to the rightful owner. Nothing ever was easy with Naruto involved, though, so it involved about three more street fights than were necessary.

Sai was sometimes glad that he had this inability to feel anger. Or like, anything.

He was trying. Some things don’t come back to you easily.  
***

“Hey, Sai, what are you doing today?”

Sai glanced up from what he was doing---what was he doing? He glanced back. He’d been watching the birds fight over some food in the street. He was standing in the middle of the road. “Oh, ah, I’m just--- nothing, why?”

Naruto grinned.

Sai didn’t like the looks of that. Nothing good ever came of that.

“You…wanna go to the bathhouse with me?”

“I’ve already seen everything you have to offer, Naruto.”

“I--- What? You’re not supposed to look at me, you creep,” Naruto was getting flustered. 

“Trust me, I’d rather not,” he said, brows knitting together slightly. “It’s the middle of the day, Naruto. Why didn’t you bathe sooner?”

Naruto sighed and started to shake Sai. Why was he always doing this? Sai blinked and looked around, locking eyes with Sakura in the distance, where she was walking towards them with Ino. He put on his most pleading expression. It wasn’t working. At this rate, Naruto would have turned him into a smoothie. Or would it be a shake?

Sighing, Sai realized what he had to do. “If you’re that determined to go peek at girls, wouldn’t you rather do so when Sakura is at the bathhouse as well?”

Naruto froze, looking where Sai was. Sakura was already rolling up her sleeves, waiting for his answer. “I--- I wasn’t going to peek, I swear—I would never--- Sakura wait---“ 

Sakura did not, in fact, wait.

***

“Hey, Sai, what do you like to eat? I mean, with Naruto it’s pretty obvious, but you never really speak up when we decide where to go,” Sakura said, hooking her arm with his, Ino on the other side doing the same. Why did he get the sense he was being roped into something he didn’t want to do?

“I like tofu,” he said, cautious. He didn’t know what they were up to, but they were getting along a little too well and it frightened him.

“And???”

“And… tofu.”

“Just Tofu?”

“It wouldn’t be my favorite if there were other things, would it?”

They both sighed, dropping his arms and walking away. 

Sai was confused, to say the least. Was that the wrong answer? Was he not supposed to like tofu?

Somehow he didn’t think it was wrong to like Tofu. Moreover, he couldn’t care less.

He was, however, concerned as to what those two were up to. Maybe he should keep tabs on them--- no, they were his teammates and his friends. He needed to trust them more.

Sai shook his head and continued on his way back home.  
***

 

“What are you doing?”

Naruto jumped, hiding something behind his back. “I---uh---it’s not--- Oh hey, Sai, fancy meeting you here,” he said, laughing nervously.

“Ah yes, especially since you’re in my home… do you mind explaining what you’re doing with my underwear?”

Naruto blanched. “What--- what are you talking about? This isn’t---“ Naruto exposed the item he’d hid behind him, which was, naturally, a journal. 

Sai held out a hand, signaling for Naruto to hand it to him. Naruto looked around, spotted the window, and dove for it. Sai pretended to care enough to shake his fist at him from the window. 

That journal was empty. He’d just bought it yesterday. Naruto was an idiot.

What kind of ninja doesn’t even look when he’s stealing written intell?

Sai shook his head and prepared for bed.  
***

Everyone seemed to be walking on eggshells around him lately. He wasn’t sure what he’d done to deserve this treatment, but he found it pretty bothersome. What were they up to? Even Kakashi had started acting weird. 

Shikamaru at least was a normal human being, up to his usual gig--- he was peacefully napping on the hillside a few yards away, occasionally waking up long enough to grunt and maybe whistle at a cloud every once in awhile. Sai didn’t mind his company, really, and found him to be very easy to draw--- he didn’t move nearly as much as Naruto. 

Sai sighed as he put down his sketch of Shikamaru. As easy as he was to draw, he was also kind of boring for the very reason that Naruto wasn’t easy to draw. He never _did_ anything. Naruto supplied him with a range of facial expressions and body positions… Shikamaru just kinda laid there. 

Sai leaned back and copied Shikamaru’s signature pose. Maybe there was something to this that he wasn’t getting. Sai supposed the sky was nice today. It was balmy, and there was a gentle breeze to keep the clouds moving. The sunlight wasn’t too bad either. Maybe there was something to this, after all.  
* * * 

“Sai? Sai what are you doing out here?” 

Sai woke abruptly, sitting up and conking heads with the inquiring person. Why couldn’t he see anything? Where was he? 

His eyes adjusted as he remembered the hillside. He must have fallen asleep. It was dark now. “Hello, Ino.”

“Hello? Is that all you have to say to me?”

“Oh—I’m sorry, Gorgeous.”

He couldn’t see it, but he could tell she was getting flustered. “That’s not what I meant! Where have you been? Why are you out here laying on the hill?”

Sai blinked. “Well, I’ve been right here. On the hill. Laying here.” 

Ino groaned. “Come on,” she said, pulling on his arm. “We’ve all been worried sick looking for you, you know.”

“Why were you looking for me?”

Ino huffed. “That’s not important--- you’re freezing! What were you thinking, taking a nap out here this time of year?”

“I was thinking, this seems like a great place for a nap, doesn’t it?”

Ino began to shake him, just like Naruto. Was this a dream? Was Naruto disguising himself as Ino? What were they up to? 

Sai waited for the shaking to stop as several others gathered around him. The shaking stopped, sure, but the lifting of his body off the ground was probably worse.  
He hadn’t realized just how cold he was until he was swung over a shoulder. Whose shoulder was this, anyways?

He heard a crinkle and the undeniable smell of barbeque chips wafted up to meet his nose. Ah, yes. Of course. Choji was probably the only one who could easily carry him over his shoulder like this.  
He briefly wondered where they were taking him before his eyelids became even heavier than he remembered. Was he drugged? 

Suddenly, a blaring noise awoke him as he was gently set on his feet. Choji’s large hands stabilized him as he swayed gently, his body trying to adjust to carrying its own weight again. Where was he?

Something similar to a lizards tongue hit his cheek with a gentle smack. What was not gentle was the noise emitted from said tongue like instrument. 

What was worse was the sudden yelling and commotion as two people grabbed him and hoisted him into the air.

“Happy Birthday, Sai!!!!” They screamed, almost in unison. 

Sai blinked. “Today isn’t my birthday.”

“What? Naruto, you told me it was today!”

Sai let out a laugh, the first real one in a long time--- as Sakura stopped in her tracks, one fist pulled back and the other full of Naruto’s shirt. In fact, everyone stopped, to stare. He wiped away at his face. This was what they’d all been acting so weird about?

“Oh man, he totally got you guys! You totally believed him!” Naruto said, pointing and laughing while holding his stomach. “Nice one, Sai!”

Sai sobered up. “No, it really isn’t my Birthday. That was last week. I wasn’t joking.”

**Author's Note:**

> i said i was sorry yo


End file.
